As we count down the days to Christmas, it means too that the new year is nearly upon us, and what better indicator of the days yet to come than the resolutions we force upon ourselves in the name of the changing calendar?
*Contributed post
Many of us put too much pressure on ourselves at this time of year, setting unattainable goals rooted in the expectations of those around us and the harsh standards we set for ourselves in an attempt to live up to others.
If you want to explore self-growth in 2023 but don’t want to be bound by goals designed to fail, here are 3 ways to set kinder goals for yourself in 2023.
Focus on feelings, not outcomes
Measurable goals are an excellent way to stay focused.
But in certain circumstances, they can also represent unreasonable expectations that, when unmet, leave us feeling like we haven’t made any progress.
For instance, if your goal is weight loss, don’t focus on a number. Instead, focus on nourishing and caring for your body in ways that make you feel good. After all, the aim of your mission is to feel better, so focus on reaping the benefits of that.
Focus on the ‘how’
There’s no point in setting yourself a goal that you’ll never have the means to fulfil.
For instance, if you plan on learning a language, don’t sign yourself up for classes at the local college if you know you’ll simply be too tired to attend after a long day at work. Instead, start small with an app like Duolingo to wrap your head around the basics.
Alternatively, if your learning ambitions are a bit more ambitious, don’t be discouraged by the complexity involved. For instance, you might dream of going back to school, but know that uprooting your life to re-enter full-time education is impossible. In that case, look at distance learning organisations such as Anglia Ruskin University, which can help you learn online with a flexible schedule.
Focus on the baby steps
We have a natural temptation to measure our successes only in completion, but in fact, you deserve to celebrate every move and milestone that brings you closer to your goal.
Don’t let cynicism taint success – there’s nothing wrong with acknowledging what it’s taken to get to where you are, no matter how far away the ultimate goal remains. Don’t overload yourself with unreasonable pressure and remind yourself to approach your achievements (and shortcomings) with the same kindness you’d apply to a loved one.
If practising kindness towards yourself is a challenge, consider spending time dedicated to your own rest and relaxation. Headspace is a meditation app with exercises dedicated to improving your self-compassion so you can treat every achievement with the appreciation it deserves.
Want New Year’s Resolutions that don’t set you up to fail? We hope our article has provided a little inspiration to help you along.
What goals are you setting for 2023? Share your hopes, dreams and ambitions with us in the comments below.